I'm 23 years old. And apparently at my age, I should have a vagyno picked out and put on speed dial. I have yet to divulge myself in the wide world of OBGYN, what with my abstaining from being wang banged and being prescribed birth control for whatever reason. So, that makes me out of the loop when my friends are swapping Gyno stories or sharing shaving secrets or gushing over whose uterus is the most normally shaped or, my personal favorite, whose Gynecologist is sexier.
And that brings me to my current ridiculous query, Male Gynecologists: The 8th Wonder of the World.
Women fanny nannies? Sure. We know what to expect. We know that beneath the Fruit of the Loom armor we will find God's sense of humor. We see it every day, and in the most unattractive and farthest-from-sexy way for one week a month.
And so, my bewilderment has led me to whip up a pros and cons list as an attempt to deem it acceptable for a man to be a doctor down south of the mouth. Observe:
Pros to being a medical Mr. Whiskerbiscuit:
- You're gay, and are therefore visually unscathed by the daunting coslopus.
- You are well-versed in the Chronicles of Vagarnia, and said knowledge could give you the upper hand in maintaining a strategically happy, healthy sex life.
Cons to being a medical Mr. Whiskerbiscuit:
- You're gay, and are therefore visually scathed by the daunting coslopus.
- You have to platonically poke, probe, feel around, lift, move, scrape, smell, slide, enter, exit and most importantly, look fixedly upon a flesh-toned venus fly trap for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Cons > Pros. The defense rests.